"The trick is growing up without growing old."

- Casey Stengel

     

      Well good night to you all, my nutty friends, did you behave properly since our last meeting? I bet you didn't.

      Shakespeare (that madman) once said that the whole world is a stage. But guess what? It’s not honey. The whole world is indeed a show, but a much more exciting, unexpected and freaky one: a circus. And in this life, we are all freak shows whether we like it or not. Good thing I do.

      I’ll begin to explain: our life has six stages. During our childhood, we are animals. It sounds rough to say it but it’s true: we basically eat and sleep. Other than that we just do a few tricks our parents taught us and look cute while people stare at us. Also, everyone likes children/animals on a part-time basis: they are great for 15 minutes but after that people start to lose interest.

      When childhood comes to its end and our parents start to sigh from relief…Hello puberty! It’s every parents’ worst nightmare: a teenager. And what could a teenager be other than a trapeze? We are a bunch of careless idiots who think that can freaking fly.  And we don’t even think we need a safety net, no sir. Good think we have our parents to catch us when we fall. They are essential, yes, but let’s just admit they make a very paranoid, controlling, crazy net sometimes.

      As we say goodbye to our permanently euphoric hormones, we should expect to say hello to a more mature stage of our life. We wish! Don’t forget those years fresh out of college, when you get your first job, earning the minimum wage, ahhh… that’s the life. Do you know what we are then? The clowns, my friend. The base of the food chain, whether you have to get coffee or make balloon animals, you’re always bossed around like crazy and make a fool out of yourself.

      But then…ah, adulthood at last! And if children are animals, adults have to be the trainers, always apparently in control. This is the first time in your life that you’re in charge. Sounds great doesn’t it? Well, it might not be so great when the lion aims for your throat or you realize you didn’t pay the water bill in the middle of your morning shower and there’s no one to rescue you.

      And next, boy and girls, please welcome the mid life and its consequent crisis. These loonies are equilibrists: struggling to find balance between youth and old age. Those who buy a sports car are trying to get back to their youth and those who crumble under fatalities such as dining at 7pm are clearly pending towards old age. And I know that these are clichés, but remember that clichés became clichés for a reason.

       Here we come to an end: old age. They are the circus audience; they just sit there and watch. If you think this is boring you’re right wrong. Because they may just watch, but remember that at least they have popcorn, glow sticks and candy. Yes, the candy of life, which is retirement: waking up whenever you please and doing whatever you please. What a shame that none of us will actually have one right? Lucky us!

      However, remember that a  Joker is not a clown, never. A clown is a fool, the Joker is the master of the show. I do what I want, when I want and with whom I want as long as my mom allows me to. 

      And before I say goodbye, I must thank a very special friend, her name is Poison Ivy and she has the privilege to read my non sense before anyone else, she helps me out when inspiration gets mad at me and  when I need to find pictures of bears riding bicycles. This blog would certainly be possible without you, but it would most likely suck as well. 

      See you next week fellows.

The Joker, 

Sophie Grey